Straight from Kierkegaard… OH SHIT!
Hello from Miami, where the heat permeates even the concrete walls. I keep thinking about the Crab in the boiling pot of water, eating cord as it slowly gets cooked. I wonder when my eyes will melt out like the end of Indiana Jones.
Back at it this week, I think I’m near 100% again. It’s been a good two month that I haven’t been able to do anything and rhythm and approaches have all been off. Be it COVID, work, the shop the move, events, etc everything has been a downhill mess these past 2 months and putting it all together as I fall. I think I’ve finally hit some straight land, and now starting to get my rhythm going.
It’s concerning, to say the least, when this happens. A slight sense of depression can come in, and you start wondering if you are getting old or losing ‘your touch” on things when it just seems you hit a hurricane of shit. I also have to get used to delegating duties and end all of it: ASK FOR HELP. Not easy for an asshole like me.
Still moving things. I’ve been selling like mad on eBay, getting rid of bits and baubles, some expensive, some whatever, to make ends meet at this rough time. In doing that, I’ve uncovered some fantastic projects I want to do for the youtube channel which will be coming up. In that I poured a lot of work, and I mean a lot of work into this one box, which has about 25 years of Comic work, both published and un published into this one box. At first I was a little bummed about it, seeing so little but as I peeled through page per page, I was amazed at how much I had done. A lot of it should have seen more public light, not for nothing else just to have it out there. Some of it was not, and is not ready for anything, experiments and insanity on my part. Either way, it weight like and taking room, so I need to to go through it.
Hunting for a new place to live with the little lady recently. We may be able to eke out an existence here in Miami, but the question is to have a place to plant our flag and make our stand. Our current place leasing agreement is partly bullshit, and the area is getting bought up hardcore. Gentrification is very real here in Miami, where the median income is shit, but the housing market keeps going high. We’ve met with some real estate people, and some promising leads. It bring a smile to our faces when we look at a place to find a nice cubby hole for ourselves. It’s nice to be with someone who loves me and I love and that all that matters. Everything else is decoration, a plus, a bonus, so we don’t hurt as much in looking as long as we are together. Wish us luck!
I need to paint. Not anything in particular put paint to canvas. I don’t fucking care anymore, I have all these ideas, but id’ rather FUCKING PAINT. Plans for this too. Right now alongside the housing market many artists are supremely fucked out of studios. What spaces they are have a waiting list, and what can be found are astronomically expensive. Still…. i need to paint. Something as frivolous as space shouldn’t stop me.
Making time to sketch is one thing. To draw is my daily meditation. Alongside all the other things this is the real workout I do everyday. I don’t care where it goes, it has to happen, so I can preserve the bits of sanity I have left. I’m already going off my rockers with business and age, might as well do it in style with something to show. I’ll be the most talented maniac in the asylum I guess.
Been writing notes too, sketching and putting together bits for FWACATA ANTHOLOGY #2 ( you can get the first issue here and here) but recently came to a conclusion that for all my various notes on the history of this and the origin of that, that it’s better to show the story and have you all get figure it out. I hate nothing worse than heavy-handed explanation. I live by the adage “Show me Don’t tell me” when it comes to storytelling.
Other than this, I have to celebrate one thing: It’s been one month since I smoked a cigarette. Fucking ay. I started again during COVID, having sort of quit beforehand. Since I figured it might be the end of the world, I figured I might as well have a smoke. Since then its lost it luster with me and I started Vaping. I can not say I’m in amazing shape now afterwards, having recovered from 4th round of COVID ( I think), but ti’s good to get away form it all. I miss it a little, mostly for the break it gave me. But I’m done. At this age (44) only bad shit can happen if I keep going. So yeah, thats the end of that era. And thats good.
So yeah, things are happening again. I’m glad. I was stagnant for a bit. HOW THE FUCK DO PEOPLE DO IT? how can you just sit there and watch life pass by? HOW?!
Alright, then, it’s time to go. Thank you, whoever you are, for reading this, for like this, and for just being part of this. Every time I get a notice, it warms the cockles of my black heart. It shows something about creating things; I’m not just screaming at the clouds.
Though they know what they did!